Saturday, October 1, 2011

FDNY - I Love You Anyway.

It's now October, my pets, so it's time to start anew.  Which we will do.


Today I'm thinking about our 2012 topic.  I really need to get this hammered out this month.  You see, October is going to be an 'easy' blog month, in that our project is challenging, but not sleep-depriving or vomit-inducing, as November's promises to be.  (Seriously, it's gonna be a bad month.  If you know me personally, if you see me approaching on the street in November, just back away.  It's for your own good.)  Then it will be December....and I know it's hard to believe from the quality of my finished product, but this blogging sh*t takes time and research, and I need to get my act together before December arrives so I can keep you entertained next year.

It seems that my readership spikes during months when I'm doing something that either a) causes me a great deal of physical pain, like sit-up month; or b) causes a great deal of mental anguish and a moderate amount of deprivation, like vegan month.  So then I had this brilliant idea for 2012 - I was going to test to be an FDNY firefighter.  No, not really BECOME one, but I was going to study for, physically prep for, and take the actual test.  I figured you guys would absolutely pee your pants at the thought of me trudging around a track next year with 80 pounds of gear, and learning how to handle a fire hose - while maintaining my status as the resident Siren Sex Goddess of Okanogan County.  And hello, think of all the firefighters I'd get to meet while I'm "training."

But it turns out that FDNY isn't interested in 42-year old women who spend 40+ hours a week sitting at a desk, and who have only actually handled a fire hose once when they were 17, and that was only for like 15 minutes in boot camp, and they were scared sh*tless the whole time they were doing it.  To quote one of the greatest movies of all time - "INCONCEIVABLE!"   According to the FDNY website, if you are over 29 years of age, you are encouraged NOT to test ("encouraged" meaning "we won't let you sign up").  So now I'm back to square one, topic-wise.  Upside - I did find a link for this really cool "FDNY" jacket which I plan on ordering for myself as soon as I finish the post.  Hopes dashed, but at least I get a souvenir out of it.

Your ideas are encouraged...the more outlandish, the better.  I know that you have my best interests at heart.   

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